Initial Thoughts

So what is this blog and what's the purpose of me even writing this?

Ultimately its to give back without any expectation of anything in return. I have this need to help others but at the age of 50, have come to realize that a lot of times it tends to lead to disappointment and feeling unappreciated for my efforts.  I've tried volunteering and that also comes with issues.  It's worse than applying for a job.  Like many of the billions of people I feel like I have this wealth of life experience and knowledge that would greatly help others. 

So what makes me so different from everyone else?

Nothing.  I'm not special and don't deserve anything.  My time is limited and once I'm gone I'll be forgotten like the those that came before me.  What I do have is years of self growth, reflection and insights on what's worked for me during these 50 years.  I do have one gift that seems to be rare.  I think very far into the future.  When dating I'd be thinking about marriage, kids, and retirement.  This just on the first date.  My parents, I though about their retirement and how they would manage when I was in University.  I'm always thinking ahead.  It's apparently not a common thing since most people barely think about one week in advance.

If these insights are helpful and if you can get one idea out of these then it will be worth it.  If you don't get anything from these notes, then that's fine also.  I'll at least feel like I've done my part without any expectation in return.  Just the feeling that I gave and left it at that.  It's the expectations of something in return that is that lead to disappointments.  It's also some of the greatest feelings of joy.  When I think back about the help I've provided others, I can count on one hand the few which were grateful.  There aren't many, and it makes me sad.  But some of that is on me and my expectation for something in return.  

I feel excited about starting this, and am holding back from just dumping everything at once since I'd like to make this a consistent thing for myself.

Until next time!